The rise of adultery websites in recent years has been worrying on many levels, and particularly given the brazen self-publicity that a number of high profile websites have been indulging in of late. Adultery has always been with us, and it is always a great sadness to see the hurt that comes to families when someone betrays their marriage vows, but is it fair to say that this more modern phenomenon is destroying Christian values? US Christian dating website onlysinglechristians.com think so.
They are certainly making it easier for people who are already inclined to stray to find willing partners. Dating and introduction sites have historically always had their fair share of married people using them, but there was always an air of disapproval by single people using them, just as there is on the more traditional dating scene. Now though these adultery sites are making a virtue in their own eyes of their selfishness, even going so far as to cite Free Speech as an important platform of their struggle for acceptance.
The problem seems to be not so much that the sites are destroying Christian values, but that they are a symptom of a widespread moral faltering in our society. The reasons for this moral failure can be cited very easily when we think about the hyper-sexualised nature of today’s media, but this always seems to smack of excuses to me. No one, not even the devil, can make us commit adultery. The responsibility for the adultery, and by extension the failure to live up to Christian values, lies with the adulterer and the adulterer alone.
Hebrews 13:4 tells us that “God will judge the person who commits adultery”, leaving us with the challenge of how to forgive the sin against us. Infidelity by one partner against another is perhaps one of the most painful situations that a couple can be faced with, and it’s why St Paul stresses the need for both husbands and wives to be responsible for fulfilling each other sexually (1 Cor. 7:3).
Adultery websites are another form of temptation put in our paths, but they are no more dangerous to a loving and committed Christian couple than any other form of temptation. To say therefore that they are destroying Christian values is something of an exaggeration. This does not mean however that they are something that we can ignore or condone. As Christians we have a responsibility to stand up and be counted and to point out the things that are wrong in the world. Adultery websites such as www.mybedoryours.com certainly count in that regard but isnt everyone free to make their own decisions in life?