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When you have been single for quite a while, there might be some moments when you think of dating again. but with the kids, chores, your job and many other things in mind- is it still possible?

here are some tips for you to ease your way into the single and looking category of dating. the idea of dating again after a while of being single AND the divorce can be quite intimidating; you can’t help to wonder if you are ready to date again. how will the children react? how should I behave? Where should I start? Dating has it’s ups and downs, but dating can be rewarding if you always see the bigger picture and the brighter side of it.

1. you make the rules. many people are seem stereotyped and hyped up about single mums dating. Forget about them. A single mum can date casually or seriously, a single mum can have fun, go out dancing, go to the salon, get some drinks and have sex. It’s YOUR private life and what everybody else says doesn’t really matter. as long as you act responsibly, remember it’s not just about you. being a single mum doesn’t mean you have to be depressed about what has happened and not take care of yourself and focus ALL your energy on your kids.

2. get a sitter. you should avoid introducing every man that comes in to your life to your kids. Hold the thought of giving your kid’s the idea that your guy is “mummy’s new boyfriend”; wait for the right time, the right person and the right moment. Always be ready to phone in a reliable and honest sitter to be with your kids so that you don’t end up bringing them along every time you go out on a date.

3. He’s not your parenting partner- yet. so resist the temptation of sharing parenting roles with him. Don’t rely or lean too hard on him too soon. you both should decide when the time is right and all of your thoughts are in the same lane.

4. Set your priorities straight. Always keep this in check, do you spend more time with your beau rather than with your kids? Don’t make your kids be the reason why you can’t be intimate with someone, stop making your kids as an excuse why you can’t socialise.

5. when you are out on a date, stop fidgeting and worrying about your kids. one thing that single mums tend to do that spoil a date is worrying and always calling and checking on the kids when they should be concentrating on their date. It’s okay that you are worried about them, but don’t feel guilty that you are on a date and you’re kids are at home. It’s okay that you phone them once or twice while out dating.

6. Don’t give into the social pressure when dating. when the time comes when your beau is already “welcome” in your home; you don’t need to explain yourself to the neighbours when they see your beau visiting and going in your house, or playing with your kids. if you feel that the status of your relationship right now is right for you and your kids, then go ahead, make sure that you have no regrets up to this point.

7. Expect some resistance from your children. there have been a lot of scenarios especially for dating parents where the mums are dating the nicest guys around but the kids just can’t accept him. This is true especially when he’s the first guy you ever went out with after the divorce or the first one your going steady and serious with. you should always keep this in mind, kids think of your new beau as a competition to your attention and affection. Learn to acknowledge your kids’ feelings and reassure them that you love them but sometimes you have to take a break and have fun with your friends, just like them. Never let your kids control you and you don’t have to force them into liking your guy.

So here are the 7 rules for the single mums who want to be back in the dating scene. Remember these helpful tips when you go online or offline to find your perfect match to ensure that you have a wonderful dating experience.